will the real lboogie please stand up?

why do i still feel the need to maintain status quo? i'm so torn between what i should do and what i really want to do. what do i really want to do? pack my shit. kidnap my girl. drive west. see what happens. seriously. after 12 weeks in VT, the last thing i want to do in this lifetime is spend 10 hours a day letting the Man pimp my brain. In spite of my true desires, I still find myself playing the job search game, but I don't have the heart, and I'm all about heart. as i stand at the fork in the road, why do i lack the courage to do my own thing? 'cause it's lonely out here...